Manifesting Magic in Our Lives: Creating Our Desired Reality Through Intentional Seeking

As I delve into the topic of "Manifesting Magic In Our Lives" I explore the question " what am I looking for?"

When we seek magic, we discover enchantment in the everyday, but when we anticipate problems, challenges seem to multiply. This principle extends to our interactions with others – if we anticipate defensiveness, we may unknowingly provoke it.

By examining our preconceptions and expectations, we can cultivate greater awareness of our perceptions and responses. Join me in uncovering the power of intention and attention in shaping our realities and relationships.

Check out the two books I mention in the episode and shout out to Dr. James Doty.
Thank you for all of your wisdom.

Mind Magic
Into The Magic Shop

Masterful Listening is sponsored by Rad Hats For Rad Humans. 30% of every purchase goes towards mental health initiatives. If you write a review of the show, you get 20% off a Rad Hat of your own.

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Email: Svetlana.thisisit@gmail.com
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Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:19

Welcome back, masterful listeners. Today we're going to talk about one of my favorite topics: magic. Magic and manifestation. I think, you know, when people think of manifestation, at least from what I've heard from so many people talking about it and exploring it and even teaching it, it's often thought of as this sort of spiritual secret of how do you create all this beauty and richness and wealth and abundance in your life. And that's a beautiful thing to want to create. Although it's so much more than that. We are always manifesting things in our life, whether we know it or not. I've often been told that I'm one of the most powerful manifestors that people know. And I think there's a lot of truth to that. I've often created a lot of what I've wanted in my life. And one time I was told, and I'll never forget this, wow, Svet, you are the most incredible manifester and the most incredible evaporator. And I was like, wow, I think you're right. I create, but I destroy. And I wasn't really mindful of this. I wasn't aware that I was definitely creating a lot in my life, but I wasn't always creating what I wanted. I was often creating things I thought I wanted, but they weren't exactly actually what led me to joy and to the best relationships or to the success that I was seeking at work. So I've been really diving deep into this idea of manifestation and magic because I think often, you know, that word magic is associated with, you know, being a magician and casting a spell. And that's not what I'm talking about. I'm talking about how life can feel so magical when things happen that we've dreamed of, that we've wanted. And sometimes they just sort of appear almost out of nowhere like magic, but they don't just appear out of nowhere. We are always creating because it has to do with what we're focused on. It has to do with our intentions. And honestly, it has to do with our brain. There's an incredible author, and um, he's really changed my life. His name is Dr. James Doty. Shout out to Dr. D. I'm excited for when you come on the show at some point. But Dr. Doty just released his uh latest book called Mind Magic, and it is fascinating. I'm gonna link it. I'm also gonna link the last book that he wrote that completely changed my life. It's called Into the Magic Shop. So, yes, the word magic is there. And what's interesting about Dr. Dhodi's books and work is that he, and he told me this personally when I met him recently. He's an atheist. He doesn't believe necessarily that there's some higher force in the universe that is creating and manifesting things. It's actually really us. It's our brain, it's what we're focused on, and it's the mindfulness to even start looking at what have I been creating? Because a lot of us are creating all kinds of things we don't really like, right? Think about your life. Think about the things that you have created, think about the home that you live in, think about the body that you inhabit, think about the work that you do, think about the relationships that you have, think about how much money is in your bank account. You have been the creator of all of this. We often look outside of ourselves. We often blame the world or others and look at circumstances, but the truth is we are so much more in control than we think. And while we cannot control the world, we can control our mind more. I'm a mental wealth advocate. I believe that our mental health is our wealth, and that is very tied to the physiology, physiology of our brain and our body. When our brain is working well, when the systems of our brain are flowing together and doing what they're supposed to do, we have greater focus, we have greater attention, we're more creative, and then we can take action that literally takes this idea of magic and makes it real. And that is really manifestation. And I always say, if you are the problem in your life, you're also the solution. But how do we shift gears, right? So we're gonna dive a little bit more into that today. Welcome back to the world's first super rad listening school. Thank you for being here. I'm gonna invite you to listen masterfully again. And what that means is listen to my words, listen to my tone, listen to what I'm saying and how I'm saying it. And when you get distracted, because you probably will, bring yourself back, come back, breathe deeply, make sure you're in an environment with the least amount of distractions possible, and practice listening as a mindfulness practice, because the way that we listen to ourselves is the foundation upon which we listen to the world and we listen to other people. And there's nothing more powerful than truly listening to what we want, to our thoughts, to our beliefs, because that is manifesting our life, whether we know it or not. So let's manifest the things we really do want rather than creating and recreating the things and the loops that we've been stuck in that are not serving us. Right? Sounds good. I want that for everyone. I want you to have magic in your life. And magic, I find it's like the simple things, right? I came up with this ritual a few months ago where I was calling a friend or I'd call my mom and I'd say, Do you want to hear the magic of the day? And what that meant was I was just really setting an intention every morning to look for the little bits of magic everywhere. So perhaps a really kind smile from a stranger, right? Or a really beautiful tree that I hadn't noticed before when I was walking with Rad because I was on my phone, right? How present was I in my life versus thinking about the next class, the next podcast, the next thing I wanted to do. That literally prevented me from focusing on what is. And presence is a gift. Just being in our current reality is so powerful because if we're not, no matter what you create and manifest, you're just going to be looking for the next thing and the next thing. And then when does that end? It's a trap, it never ends, right? Can we appreciate the magic, the ordinary magical moments in life? And when I was doing this magic of the day ritual, I'd had a few people say, Wow, Svet, do you just have so much more magic in your life than others? And I said, No, I'm just looking for it. So again, paying attention intentionally is what creates your life. When I was in a time of depression, and when I felt horrible, and the thoughts that I had in my head and the beliefs were really dark and negative, and I thought, everyone sucks. The world is cruel. There are no opportunities out there. I would go out in the world and I wouldn't see anyone smiling. I wouldn't see any joy because my mind wasn't looking for that. My mind was feeding the story that I had, that everything was dark and horrible, and I kept finding more of that. I mean, think of yourself. Think of a day that you have where you're in the kind of mood where you're excited and open to opportunities and open to your day, feeling peaceful, how those days go versus the days that you're like, oh God, work is gonna suck, and the people on my team are annoying and people are gonna be defensive, and my friends aren't showing up from me and they're selfish. What happened then? What happened when you woke up and thought, you know what, today's gonna be a great day. I'm gonna feel good, I'm gonna feel healthy, I'm gonna have energy. And how did that day go? I guarantee the days went very, very differently. What outcome are you seeking? What you are seeking is seeking you. And when you're seeking magic and goodness and joy and connection, you are way more likely to find it. And this isn't some woo-woo concept. This is your brain rewiring and working in a way that it's been working. And if you've been seeking destruction and things to be hard, if you're assuming things are always hard, they're gonna keep being hard. And I'm not saying this is some sort of magic where suddenly your entire life will transform in just a moment, but it actually can. It's practice. The more you practice, the more you flex that magic manifestation muscle, the more it grows, the more your brain starts to look for the things that you actually want to build. Right? I always remember that time that someone said, Wow, you're such a powerful manifester, but you're the most powerful evaporator. It's incredible how much I can evaporate in a moment where I just feel so sad and bad, and I'm assuming everything is falling apart. You know, those moments, it's kind of those shit spirals that we get into, where we're sad about an opportunity that fell through, and then we're kind of angry at ourselves for being sad, and then we're sort of frustrated that we're back in that cycle, and then we're sad about that. It just loops and loops and loops, and truly the first step is awareness. Wow, here's what I'm doing again, here's what I'm believing. Wow, my heart is beating really fast. I'm really sweaty, I'm really nervous. Ugh, this didn't go the same way again. Just noticing that and accepting, okay, this is where I'm at. I don't like it. Where do I want to be? And what kind of thoughts do I need to have? What kind of belief systems do I need to have? Who do I show up as? What am I looking for? Because what you're looking for, you will find. We feed the stories that we have over and over again. Our brain can only take in a tiny, tiny, tiny portion of all the stimulus that we're getting constantly. And so you're missing a lot of what's around you just because that's the way our system can function. So again, the question that I really want to land with you, want you to hear is what have you been looking for? There was a really interesting experiment done called the Gorilla Experiment that Dr. Doty talks about in his book Mind Magic. And I'm gonna just summarize it. I hope I get all the details correct, but you'll get the gist. They put a bunch of people in a room, and their task was to throw a basketball back and forth to each other and to count exactly how many times they caught the ball, threw the ball, caught the ball. And somewhere within this experiment, as people were focused on this, they had someone in a gorilla suit run through the space. Why? Because they weren't looking for a gorilla, they were focused on the basketball. 50%. Isn't that wild? So think of how many gorillas are running around you, meaning how many opportunities for beauty, for connection, for love, for opportunity are right in front of you, but you're not seeing them. This happens to all of us. I had a really profound moment last night. I was laying during the sunset on my balcony. I have a swing bed on my balcony with a beautiful view. And this was something I have dreamed of for gosh, I'm 38 decades. And I and I got it. And it took a while. And it's incredible. I'm always aware of wow, I manifested this. I manifested this view and saw Salito. It felt totally impossible. And it it all kind of came together quite quickly within a month or two. And um, that was amazing. That was a really beautiful manifestation. I envisioned it for so long. I envisioned it for so long, and I ingrained it as a belief that when it happened, I wasn't even so shocked. I was still grateful and in awe, but something in me just knew it was coming. That's the other thing I want to say is we can't just think, oh, I want this, and then think that's how we're gonna manifest it. That doesn't actually work because think about that. I want this is you saying that you don't have it. If you want it, you don't have it yet. So what are you manifesting? More want. But if you truly want to experience something, just envisioning, literally closing your eyes and seeing a vision of you on that balcony, on that swing bed with the view. What is it gonna feel like? You know, our brain cannot determine the difference between something we visualize clearly in our mind and something we actually see. How incredible is that? The more you practice that, the more you rewire your brain to work more effectively and take the actions to actually create that. You can create anything, but it can also destroy just about anything. I've done that time and time again. And just remembering that can help you catch yourself in a moment where you're creating a horrible future. Because if you keep doing that, that's what's gonna keep happening. And you can shift that. You really, really can. Let me just give you a quick story and an example of how my life has felt really different why when I started, you know, searching for the magic of the day. So I teach a lot of courses online, lots of students. I've probably taught, I don't know, a few hundred people just in the last month. And often in these classes, you know, I'm practicing masterful listening, I'm really paying attention to the group, I'm watching people, I'm seeing how engaged they feel. And of course, I always want people to have a great class, right? That feels awesome. I never like the feeling of seeing someone just totally look distracted or just not interested. And I notice how often if I go into a class with this uh kind of not an assumption, but an intention of it's gonna be a great class. People are gonna be so engaged. I've noticed when I even just say that to myself, that's what keeps happening. Versus if I had kind of a weird feeling class or I got some feedback from someone where they didn't like something, which happens, right? Because I don't know where people are. Someone could be coming into a class because they were forced to be there, they're having a crappy day, they don't want to be there. Nothing I do is really gonna change that, most likely. But I kind of take it personally and I see that bad feedback, and then I have another class, and I'm going in, like, oh gosh, I hope I don't create more people who are unhappy. Those classes typically don't go as well because I came into it kind of searching for evidence that it's not going well. Right? So now before I teach, I always say it's gonna be a great class. People are gonna get a lot out of it. And I tell people that. I invite people to participate. I say, if you stay present, if you lean in, I guarantee you're gonna get more from this class. And then I check in at the end and I say, what's your takeaway? What are you leaving with? And then people can connect to that as well. And then based on that, I say, all right, make a commitment, make an intention. What are you gonna do in the next week? How are you gonna apply this? You have such a higher chance of actually doing that if you get clear on it, if you write it down, if you share it with someone, and then boom, right? We can't necessarily overhaul everything in our life at the same time, but we can do it one step at a time. I always say you can't have everything you want, or just kidding, you can have everything you want. Again, let me say that again. I really believe you can have everything you want, you just can't have it all at the same time. You wouldn't even be able to take it all in at the same time. It's like imagine you go to this amazing restaurant and you order everything and you try to eat it. You'll probably get sick and you won't even know which flavors you really felt were the best ones, what you enjoyed the most. But if you focus, you slow it down, you really taste every bite, mmm, that's a lot more delicious, right? Feels better. And that's what I want for you. I really do want you to start manifesting magic with your mind. Because whatever your spiritual beliefs are, and I'm a spiritual person, I do believe that the universe is working with us, but that's the whole thing, right? If you keep putting confusion out into the universe, and uh, if you keep putting out um this idea of I'm gonna fail into the universe, it'll work with you to create that. Uh, but if you think that's a bunch of mumbo jumbo, uh our brain does that too. So just consider what beliefs have you been creating? Let me give you an example of how to practice shifting those. So let's say you have a belief, you know, you're a manager, you have a team, and you've had some people get really defensive when you've provided feedback for them. And now you have a story that's oh my gosh, feedback is so horrible. I don't even want to give it to this person because they're gonna get defensive. What's the point? And you walk into a conversation with them like that. Most likely, as soon as you see a facial expression or as soon as they say anything that might disagree or not relate to what you're sharing, you're gonna be like, well, here we go again. Well, consider this. First, notice the story, and then ask yourself, well, what would be a different story? What would be a better story? Because as I've said before often in this show, uh, tell a good story. Uh no, wait, what do I say? Um, well, I say ask great questions, get great answers, and ask crappy questions and rule in your life. But yes, I got it. I remembered. If you're gonna tell a story, you might as well make it a good story. So, how about you know what? This person's been defensive in the Past, but I think something can shift. I think if I show up with a different intention, with a sincere intention to help them, to listen to them, to understand them, they're gonna receive it a bit better. Something new can happen. And then tell them that at the beginning of the conversation, see what happens. Practice. I guarantee if you track some data around that, it will shift. How about delegation? A lot of people have been sharing with me that their struggle and challenge around delegation is that they think, well, if I delegate, I'm just gonna stress someone out. Hmm. What about if I delegate and I actually know where someone wants to grow? I might be giving them a really great chance to grow in an area that's new for them, to support the team, right? To try something in a different way, versus, well, I'm not even gonna do this because I don't want to stress people out. That's a really honorable thought. But is it serving you? How much time are you spending doing all kinds of things that someone might be better equipped to do? Someone might be happy to do, someone might grow through doing, right? Those are just two examples at work where I want you to really ask yourself, what are the stories I've been telling myself about my people, the team, my colleagues? Are they creating and manifesting into projects going well, me feeling good at the end of the day, or is it a constant struggle? You actually can really do something about that. You can. We are magical beings. And maybe you don't like the word magic. I don't know if that resonates with you, but we're powerful beings, we're creative beings. We haven't been taught that. That's another story I would recommend you look at. Do you look at yourself as someone who's powerful in creating your life, or do you just feel like a victim? Because I've definitely felt like a victim. And when I really believed that, or where I still have moments where I feel like that, oh my gosh, my life looks radically different than when I go, you know what? I felt a lack of power, but today I'm gonna be powerful in how I look for things and how I show up. And it always feels differently. Essentially, at the end of the day, we just want the feeling of the thing we want to have. We want to feel rich, feel abundant, feel loved, feel beautiful. So are you looking for evidence to support that you are those things, or are you looking for evidence to support the fact that you're not powerful and you're not smart and you're a failure? Because you will find evidence to support what you're looking for, period. Another example personally is um I have a friend who I feel has given me feedback a lot that I'm selfish and I've been making things all about me. And so now I've gotten quite paranoid, and I find that anytime they say anything about me, or I'm speaking and taking up any space, that I'm looking for them to feed my story that I'm somehow doing something wrong. I'm assuming that my friends keep seeing me this way. And honestly, I feel like I kept creating that a bit more. And I don't want to do that anymore. I don't want to look for evidence that supports a story about me that I don't like, that I don't want to keep creating. And this has actually impacted my friends in a poor way, right? Because the truth is we all have stories about each other and we're all feeding them, but we can shift them. And that is courageous, that is deep work. It takes mindfulness, it takes self-love, it takes even the belief that maybe, maybe we can have a different experience. What if, what if there is so much more magic all around you, and all you have to do is start looking a little bit for it, or for it a little bit more. So I'm gonna keep this one short. Uh, your homework is to start looking for the magic of the day. Ask yourself what would a magical day look like? Maybe it would look like you had some nice connections with your colleagues. Maybe it looks like you take a walk at lunch and don't eat at your desk. Maybe it looks like you discover a new song that makes you feel happy. Define magic. Look at what you really want and look at what you've created and own that. Celebrate the parts of your life that you think are going real well. Keep growing those. And then look at the parts that aren't. Forgive yourself for that because you have created that. Sorry to tell you, not sorry to tell you. It's all right. We create, we destroy, and also some things need to be destroyed, right? Creation and destruction kind of come together. You absolutely can shift your life. Our brains are so amazing. We can keep growing and expanding and rewiring until we are dead. It is not too late. So see what you've done that you like, what makes you feel good about yourself, what's amazing in your life that you're proud of, and look at the areas that you really want to create some more magic in. What do you really want to manifest? And consider the stories you've been saying about that. Because if you want a lot of money and a beautiful home, but all you're talking about is how shitty the economy is and how it's impossible to have enough, that is what you will keep looking for. Truly. First, notice the belief. Then ask yourself, what would be a more empowering belief that if I could manifest more money in abundance, what would that feel like? Can you cultivate that feeling a little more in your day now? You buy yourself that $7 latte and you go, I'm rich, because you kind of are, right? Right? Anything you can see that will support the new story, you will start looking for. Your brain will be aware of it. And soon you'll look at your life and be like, wow, I ended up where I wanted. And that's the thing. Uh, you did that. It's like magic, but guess what the magic is? You are the magic. We're all magicians, whether we know it or not. And what we create is up to us. Taking responsibility for that can feel a little scary. It's like, ugh, I'm the one that has to do it all. Yeah, you're the one who gets to do it all. You're the one who's building your life, you're the one who's destroying your life, you're the one that gets to rebuild and create what you want. And if you're not loving what you've been creating, join the club. Let's shift that. Let's find a little more magic. I want that for you. I want that for me. And please subscribe, share this show if you found this useful. Share it with someone who you want to see the magic in themselves to create an even more beautiful life. One other quick thing I wanted to add. If you were paying attention earlier, I mentioned that I had a profound moment on my swing bed, on my balcony with the sunset and the view. And I want to actually say what was profound about it. Not only was the fact that yes, I was in this place that I've always dreamed of, that is amazing in itself. But here's what felt truly massive, at least to me in that moment. I'm lying on this beautiful bed, and I kind of have this favorite spot where I'm in the corner, and it's a warm night, and I'm laying on fluffy pillows with a beautiful, comfy blanket, and Rad is next to me. And I felt so peaceful as I stared out at the view. And in that exact spot on the bed, when I look straight ahead, I see this vast view of Sausolito and the Bay and Angel Island. And it's just magnificent. But right in the center, there's a beam, the beam of my balcony, the beam that is necessary to hold up the structure of my whole home. And as I sat there looking out at the view, I kept navigating towards that beam. And I found myself thinking, man, if only that beam wasn't there, then, and I was like, wow, that is exactly what we're doing. We have this magnificent view, we have this magnificent life, and we're looking at the beam, the thing in the way, the thing we wish we that wasn't there, the thing that if it wasn't there, would then make it even more beautiful. And I ask myself, do I want to be looking at the beam or do I want to be seeing and appreciating the view? And that's another thing I want to ask you to ask yourself as part of your homework after this episode. Are you looking at the beams in the way of the view, or are you just appreciating the freaking view? Because it's magnificent, and those beams that are there, sometimes they're part of the foundation and the structure. They need to be there. Maybe the beams of our life are constantly reminding us to choose our perspective. You know what I mean? And here's another thing that might help you. This is a little bit of not a secret activity, but kind of a quiet activity that I've been doing for years. And I do think it's one of the main reasons that my manifestation has been as powerful as it has been. Now, I really invite you to do this and you can make it your own, but there's one main concept, and it is to get a pen and a piece of paper and to write things down. I on the full moon every month, and I've skipped this from time to time, but if I don't write it, then I at least say it out loud to myself. But again, writing it makes it really more powerful because, first of all, when we write things down, we remember them more, and then we can just reread them over and over and over again. Again, this is what rewires our brain, as I mentioned through the episode, and I've talked about this in other episodes. We can create new neural pathways in our brain. Writing things down is an extremely effective way to do this. So on the full moon every month, and if you're more spiritually inclined or believe in astrology, cool, you can do it on the full moon. Also, the new moon is a good time to do it because technically the new moon is kind of the time for new beginnings. However, you want to do this, whenever you want to do this, but I would find a consistent time to do it. And I like the full moon because it's, you know, monthly. I write a letter of gratitude to the universe in advance for the month before. So it goes something like, and I'm gonna do this because I think it's right the end of the month. It's May. What's today? Is it the 30th? Oh, today is the 30th. And I'm not sure exactly when the full moon is, but that's not the point. You write a letter in gratitude, and it sounds something like, Dear universe. You could even say, dear Svetlana, dear you. You are the universe. You are in control. You are co-creating this thing. I don't always understand it, and I don't know why this works, but I can tell you that it's worked for me, and that's all I can share. I write a letter that says something like, Thank you so much for this incredible month that I've had. Thank you so much for the fact that June brought so much joy to me. Me and Rad continue to take the longest walks we've taken, and we hit 13,000 steps consistently. And three incredible business opportunities came in, which allowed me to deepen the mastery of my facilitation and coaching. And I am feeling so great in my body. I have felt better than ever before, and I've been consistently cold plunging, and I'm just so grateful that Rad hasn't had any more seizures. And I'm so grateful because my relationships have been thriving, etc. I write the letter as if I'm writing it at the end of June, but I'm writing it at the beginning of June, and I'm expressing gratitude for what I want to be as if it's happened. And then I sign it, I thank it, get as specific as you can. Often we're afraid to get specific because we're like, well, what if it won't happen? Uh, what if it will happen? Or what if it'll happen a little bit differently, but even better, right? The idea is you write this without attachment. You just write it in gratitude because even writing it, even saying it feels good. You start to think these things actually happened. And guess what? When you start to imagine them happening, you start acting like they're happening. Almost every single month that I remember, and I have done this hundreds of times at this point, the things have happened. Sometimes that month, sometimes later, but it is like magic. And something that Dr. Dodi says in his book that I hadn't done, that I will do, is he says, take what you write and look at it every day. Read it aloud every day. Read it in the morning, read it in the afternoon, read it in the evening. Keep ingraining that. So try it out. Try it out. What do you gotta lose? May we all manifest the things that uplift us and bring us joy and keep doing that and keep doing that. Because you know, things change and we want different things at different stages, which is why it's so cool that we have this beautiful brain and beautiful heart, an amazing body that can help us cultivate and create and create and create. Okay, okay. See you next time, magical, masterful listener, and then you're gonna be able to do it.